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For once finances seem to be going in favour of the UK motorist, with Esure announcing plans to double its share of the UK’s car insurance market - a move which is likely to spark a price war, other internet-only direct insurers passing on to consumers savings based on their low overheads, and specialist insurers offering reduced rates for their particular target markets. A trial pay-as-you-go scheme from Norwich Union is also creating a lot of interest for money conscious motorists.

The pay-as-you-go scheme uses a small box costing an initial £199 which is fitted in the driver’s boot, to record when and for how long a driver actually uses their car. The box stays in contact with a satellite which is sent regular updates of the journey data stored on the box, tracking the vehicle and then delivering the information to the insurer. The driver is then charged based upon how far at what time they used their vehicle.

“We got a statement”, said one member of the trial, “which showed what mileage we had done, and on what days of the week, as well as if we had been driving in the evenings or peak hours.”

For low mileage users, this system could present significant reductions in premiums, for higher mileage drivers searching about for the best deals at renewal time is an absolute must.

Unfortunately, last year five million motorists failed to shop around, missing out on an average premium saving of £180. Shopping around becomes especially important for anyone coming to the end of a free insurance offer on a dealership car and should not simply take the quote offered by the manufacturer’s insurer, as significant savings can be made by shopping around. Comparisons sites such as Moneynet enable consumers to quickly look at hundreds of insurance providers in one go, making it easy to find the best deals that are available, and they often have their own extra discounts which are provided through their own sites.

While the government tries to work out new ways to extract more money from motorists, the competitiveness of the insurance industry is thankfully helping to drive down the cost of insurance premiums, making it one of the few rays of hope for UK drivers.

Richard works in Edinburgh for a media company, occasionally writing for the personal finance blog Cashzilla, and drinking too much coffee.

“Wives should be submissive to their husbands as if to the Lord because the husband is head of his wife just as Christ is head of his body the church, as well as its savior” (Ephesians 5:22-23).

There’s that dreaded word submission! Lest I be accused of being a traitor to the better half (depending on who is reading this, of course!) let’s remember that even Christ submitted to his Father and the servants on earth are not greater than the Master. God is the author of peace, and there must be order in the world, from the family unit on up to the very universe itself. Actually, in verse 21, each is to submit to the other but, in the heavenly scheme of things, the wife is finally to submit to the Christian husband’s decisions. It is hoped that the husband arrives at household decisions through prayer and deep concern for the welfare and salvation of his wife and his children. Amos 3:3 warns us: “Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so?” I realize we don’t know a person until we have lived with him/her, but it would help if we agree on the basics like church, children, ideas and ideals. The toothpaste we can deal with later.

There is no inferiority implied here, for both are equal before the Lord, and each is responsible to God and to each other. God has first claim, and each have first duty to God and then to each other. It is the gracious obedience of equal to equal that God asks, so that harmony may result. I’m old enough to remember when men were men and women were women, and we seemed content with that; we complemented each other. We even threw in a compliment once a month. But today we seem hell-bent on rearranging God’s plan for mankind and womankind–and we seem to have forgotten to be kind, period.

Let’s get back to God’s plan and we’ll all be happier.

Midlife! That wonderful period of confusion, reassessment, stuckness and change …. Welcome! All of a sudden, the familiar is unfamiliar. Wouldn’t it be wonderful to have a map?

Midlife is a normal developmental life stage. It can be a positive and mindful process of the whole person you will be for your second adulthood. It cannot be avoided. Live long enough it’s as inevitable as was adolescence. You may experience loss, change, and letting go of much of what you bring into midlife. Prepare and pay attention and you can complete this journey with a minimal amount of struggle.

Dan Johnston, http://www.lessons4living.com/index.htm, reminds us that at midlife, we focus on becoming who we were meant to be rather than who we think others want us to be. We examine and evaluate every aspect of our lives and search for deeper meaning.

Suzanne Braun Levine, http://www.suzannebraunlevine.com, author of Inventing the Rest of Our Lives: Women in Second Adulthood, identifies two important steps to take to soar at midlife:

1. Recognize that change takes time and give yourself permission to move at your own speed.

2. Surround yourself with a circle of friends who will listen, support, suggest and commiserate.

To these, I would add:

3. Actively explore and resolve the seven key decisions of midlife.

What are these seven decisions?

1. What will my legacy be?

2. What meaningful work do I now want to do?

3. How can I fulfill my need to nurture?

4. How can I sustain meaningful relationships in my life?

5. How can I express myself creatively?

6. How can I meet my spiritual needs?

7. What surroundings do I want?

Because midlife usually involves redefining purpose, the first key decision is legacy. What do you hope to leave the world? How do you want to be remembered? Within that context, the second key decision has to do with meaningful work. As more people enter the workforce late or retire early, it is important to examine the role work will play in second adulthood and also to examine what work is. Many may find that part-time employment, volunteering or some form of entrepreneurship are intriguing options.

As we age, our family and social structures change. The next two decisions address this shift. As parents and children age, responsibilities change. For some, this means coping with being the filling in the family sandwich. For others, this means dealing with separation and loss. For those who have not had children, as well as for those with grown children, new ways to nurture - from being the “fun” aunt to fostering pets - emerge. As friendship patterns shift, we are faced with finding new relationships or finding alternate ways to maintain the old ones.

The next two questions address nurturing the self. Part of remaining vibrant is finding outlets for creative expression - from writing to visual arts, from crafts to culinary excellence. As you encourage your mind to grow, so too should you find ways to nurture your spirit. This decision may involve becoming more involved in the religion of your childhood or exploring other forms of spirituality. It may mean going to a house of worship or communing with nature - or both.

Finally, surroundings become increasingly important as we age. Finding the right surroundings may be crucial to your ability to implement the other six decisions and may also encompass considerations not on the list. Who do you want to be near? How will you access the things you need, perhaps including health care or support services.

Camus said, “In the midst of winter I finally learned that there was in me an invincible summer.” Create a meaningful map for each of the key decisions and use that map to navigate midlife. Find the path to your invincible summer.

Susan R. Meyer, Ed. D., CC, is a Life Coach and consultant specializing in clearing self-imposed barriers in life and at work. Her work includes empowerment programs and life-planning programs for women at midlife. Please visit her at http://www.life-workcoach.com for information about teleclasses (free and fee), workshops and newsletters. You can contact her at dr.susan@life-workcoach.com

Direct Answers - Column for the week of February 17, 2003

Back when I was in grammar school, every once and awhile I would meet up with a girl my age and talk. Lisa never was around much, but she was always very sweet and nice. In 5th grade she was assigned to my class.

She was absent a lot, and one day I had the courage to ask why. She told me she was sick, and she explained she wore a wig because her medicine made her lose her hair. We left it at that. Anytime Lisa came to class–a rarity–I would hang with her on the playground.

I received much ridicule from my friends for this because they thought I was snubbing them for Lisa. My family upbringing taught me to be nice, and I felt Lisa’s needs were much more important than others I knew.

It had been months since Lisa was in class, and one day our teacher was crying. She explained Lisa died the day before and would no longer be our classmate. She told us Lisa fought a battle with leukemia for years.

I was stunned and shocked. Lisa never spoke of her illness as if it could kill her, and I was a very innocent girl in these matters. Well, all those years I have kept Lisa in my mind and heart. When I pass milestones in my life, I reflect on Lisa and say a prayer for her.

I’ve had strong feelings of late to locate her mother and father. I’d like to tell them that though they never met me, their daughter had a sweet, profound effect on my life. I have no idea what her parents’ first names are and don’t have money to hire a detective. I read you column and realize you are not detectives, but hope you can point me in the right direction.

I pray regularly and believe something or someone is encouraging me to make this connection. I hope my connection would not hurt or upset. Lisa was such a lovely girl. Maybe her parents would be comforted that after all these years they are not the only ones who remember her.

Cynthia

Cynthia, start with the school. You may get a lead from a former classmate, alumni group, teacher, or the parent and teacher association. Don’t overlook the newspaper of record where you used to live. It probably published birth and death records including parents’ names. Former neighbors may also help.

Reference librarians are invaluable. They can steer you to public government records and genealogy groups, the experts at tracking families. From among these sources, you will find someone who can help. Our lives are our relationships, and sensing a deep purpose is natural.

Tamara

Another Victim

When I read Esme’s letter, it immediately took me back to my own childhood when my mother would warn my brother and me, “Your father is on his way home, and he is in a bad mood today.”

What she called a bad mood was the effect of drinking, and we would actually hide in closets from him. Growing up in that volatile environment has affected me, even today. I relate intimately to the grown-up children you describe: people pleasers who judge themselves harshly, with constant feelings of dread and a need to be secretive.

I want to tell Esme that not only did this impact my relationship with my father, but with my mother as well. I will never understand why she didn’t see what staying with my father did to my brother and me. I will never understand why she didn’t protect us.

Sometimes understanding “why” an alcoholic drinks can lead to excusing it, and I would stress to Esme how detrimental this can be. If she does not leave for herself, she should at least leave for the children.

Beth

Beth, thank you for caring enough to share your story.

Wayne

About The Author

Authors and columnists Wayne and Tamara Mitchell can be reached at www.WayneAndTamara.com.

Send letters to: Direct Answers, PO Box 964, Springfield, MO 65801 or email: DirectAnswers@WayneAndTamara.com.

Samoens is one of the best snowboarding resorts for much entertainment and relaxation. Samoens is an awesome area that offers the holiday maker hiking, white water rafting, biking, events and other activities for all the family to savor.

However when the snow starts to settle on the tree tops and summits, and the ponds begin to ice over, Samoens switches its look from vivid fall colors to a blanket of white. Samoens abounds winter activities ” sleigh rides, cross country skiing and telemarking.

Samoens was voted the number 1 skiing mountain in the Alps annually by snowboarding publications and avid snowboarders. It rises a impressive 3700 meters up, it with 60 runs, the longest is 3.75 km. kilometers, and altogether there are 520 miles of skiing. There are slopes for novices and reasonable skiers, and 48 pistes for snowboarding experts.

Samoens’s lift systems can handle 25000 skiers an hour so theres no wasting of fun time waiting to get to the top. You are able to select the bubble for a fine overall vista of the mountainside and the whole area. For the hungry tourist, there are many mountain restaurants who provide vin chaud and broths, sandwiches or lavish meals. For more information why not visit www chamonix .com.

One of the most popular forms of life insurance is the variable life insurance policy. With variable life, one gets permanent insurance (like whole) along with the opportunity to isolate specific investment opportunities at which premiums are directed.

One can invest in any number of opportunities with a variable life insurance plan. In essence, the insured is able to control the investment of the policy’s cash value instead of relying upon the pre-established rate of return provided in a whole life solution. This makes variable life insurance very attractive to those who believe the rates of return offered by more traditional insurance policies can be easily outstripped with superior investment strategies.

However, variable life insurance policies carry with them a level of risk directly proportional to the skill of the investor and the quality of his or her decisions. Although variable policies create an opportunity for tremendous growth, they also allow a market decline to decimate the cash value of the policy. Fortunately, there is some safety net, as variable life policies will retain a death benefit that will not fall below the amount of insurance initially purchased. As such, even an errant investor cannot decimate the true insurance value of the policy, even though he or she may do tremendous harm to its cash value.

Absent consideration of the investment component, variable life policies are quite similar to whole life policies. In both cases, death benefits remain fixed, regular premiums are fixed and the insured can borrow against the cash value of the policy. Also, in both policy types the cash value accumulated by the policy is tax-deferred. The investment component inherent in variable life insurance policies requires they be considered a security by the federal government and a prospectus is issued for all variable life insurance policies. This “security” labeling does not significantly alter the behavior of the plan when compared to other insurance plans, however.

Variable policies provide an opportunity to retain appropriate levels of death benefits while having the simultaneous opportunity to invest premiums on one’s own in hopes of generating a higher cash value for the policy. This creates a tremendous potential upside for variable life insurance policies, but also opens the door for potential losses in cash value depending on investment performance. Although one will not see a change in death benefits if investments fail to adequately perform, they will see a decline in cash value that can significantly reduce the policy’s utility as a source of supplemental retirement income or as a means of handling financial emergency.

Alternatively, a savvy investor can use a variable life policy to create a sizeable retirement nest egg while deferring taxes until dispersal. Successful investment can produce a cash value for the policy that could conceivably dwarf the value of whole life policies. The flexibility of variable life insurance plans and the possibility of generating significant cash value gains makes them a very popular life insurance for those with the skills or insight to invest wisely.

Why Movies and Music Move and Motivate Us

I believe films and music have the power to motivate and move us in a very powerful way. A great script brought to life by wonderful actors can touch us in very profound ways. We gladly hand over our money to be entertained but why do some films affect us in such a strong way?

I believe the impact of great film or piece of music happens because we get to engage all of our senses. We are mesmerized because we see it, hear it, feel it and involve our active imagination as well. It can spark memories or “hit” us in a place that triggers real emotion. For film or theater none of this happens until we make an unspoken agreement. The agreement we, as the audience make is to suspend our beliefs for 2 hours. The suspension of belief allows us to be completely immersed in a story even if what we’re watching can’t happen in “real life”.

People loved the Indiana Jones, Star Wars or the “Back To The Future” films because we made the unspoken agreement to suspend our belief for 2 hours and let the stories move us. Even though most of the “events” in the films did not reflect “real life” they provided important messages and entertained us at the same time.

This got me wondering. What if we suspended our beliefs in our daily lives? We agree to do it when we walk into the movie theater (and pay for it!) so why not when we step into our lives? Here are 3 benefits of suspending your belief every day:

• Increase in “Present Time” Focus
When focused “in the moment” we reduce our preconceived notions about people and situations and therefore are less “cluttered” in our minds. Being “in the moment” is like being in the “zone” athletes refer to so much. When we are there we are more focused, relaxed and energized.

• Improved Listening Skills
When we are focused in the present we are able to communicate more effectively. Without the distraction of negative or limiting thoughts we are able to listen with greater clarity and be more attentive to the person we are speaking to.

• Stronger Commitment

Think back to one of your favorite films and you might find that you enjoyed it because you were fully engaged and committed to the story. We love certain films because they spark something within us whether it’s a sense of adventure, romance, uplifting the human spirit or any other human condition we relate to. Next time you perform a task or just communicate with another person be fully engaged and notice if you feel more powerful and energized (and the impact on them as well).

Films can motivate and inspire us whether they are fiction or not and powerful messages never go out of style. They help us reconnect with a part of us that triggers us to think, feel and act differently even if for a short time. John Lennon has been gone for 25 years and yet the moving messages in his music can affect you today the same it did 25 years ago. It doesn’t matter how old it is because anything that “hits” us at our core will always have the ability to move and motivate us. Imagine…

David is a Speaker/Facilitator/Performance Coach and Author of “Wired To Win”. He works with Athletes (PGA/LPGA) and Business (Ameritech, Motorola, etc.) to help people perform at the ‘top of their game” using a not “business as usual” approach. He focuses on “Human Performance Competencies” to create faster shifts in how people think, feel and perform every day. David has appeared on The Golf Channel, ESPN radio and has spoken to all size businesses across the country. Book orders: 888.280.7715. To find out more about presentations or workshops, call: 847.681.1698 or email: david@theflowzone.net or visit the web: http://www.theflowzone.net

I am not the type of person who sits around complaining when things don`t go my way but sometimes the truth needs to be told. I`ve never been known as “spoiled,” or have gotten everything my way. In fact, I am just the opposite. I guess I am what you call “cast away.” You see, Ive had my share of rough times and always overcame them on my own. But it is just the simple fact that no one cared which hurt most.

Growing up I did get some things, more than most kids had gotten, but I didn`t get as much as “the other one.” Does it feel good to be yelled at for wearing the same clothes with holes in them, the only clothes you would get for me? But what about “the other one” that gets to wear Old Navy, Abercrombie, American Eagle, and look as if she`s getting ready for a fashion show. And people wonder why I`m crazy.

Now let`s not even get into the whole vehicle problem. How do you think it feels when you get your car sold because is dad is juiced up on Oxy`s, not knowing what he is thinking. Or when you get the only other method of transportation taken from you for being nice and giving someone a ride home when he shouldn`t even have been around me in the first place. It`s not the fact that I`m a complainer, but when “the other one” is getting a fancy car, while I`m walking everywhere that I go. How would it make you feel?

Now I could buy anything I need and always could have but when no one gets you anything and “the other one” gets a laptop computer, an I-Pod, any cd, and any pair of shoes that she wants. How would you feel? Would you feel good when “the other one” is living in luxury waiting for her next pair of shoes while I`m living in an abandoned apartment across the street. Or how would you feel living with a gay dude and getting screamed at every five minutes from someone that is supposed to be your friend. Would it make you happy?

The point is that some things in life are unfair and you may feel that there is no way out. But I am here to tell you that you can make it! Don`t get upset over the little things because someone, somewhere has it worse than you do. Fight the battle head on because you know that you are going to win. It might not happen right away but eventually the results will start paying off. Until next time, later!

MY SITES: http://www.mightybody.com and http://www.geocities.com/bashore69/bodybuildingarticles.html

Did you ever have a moment in time when you think to yourself, “This is it. This is the moment. Life just can’t get any better.” And then, it does. Such a moment happened to me, last week, while whale watching in Ma’alaea Bay on the Alii Nui.

It was a gorgeous day out on the water. The weather could not have been more perfect and the whale sightings were plentiful. It was a day when total strangers are your friends. We had all shared the experience of seeing these powerful mammals arcing out of the water and diving back in. (This is called breaching.) We had even seen a baby whale heading towards our catamaran until the mother herded her away. I was relaxing against the side of the boat, enjoying the warm breeze and contemplating the perfection of the moment. The activity of the whales had died down and it was almost time to return to the harbor, when Captain Chris yelled, “She’s coming back. The baby’s coming back.”

Baby and Mama and an unknown male were headed towards us. Diane, a crew member, explained that the unknown male was not the father but a stray male hoping to get lucky. At this, the woman next to me and I rolled our eyes. I said what we were both thinking, “Good luck guy. Mama has recently given birth to several tons of baby whale. I’m thinking, not gonna happen.” The excitement was palatable on the boat as the whales got closer and closer. Then, all three passed right under us. We could see all of their outlines through a watery x-ray type of effect. Baby looked to be a little bigger than Mama’s head. Mama looked like a submarine next to baby. Our exhilaration grew as they made one pass after another, three in total.

While I was thrilled that Baby had come so close, I wanted her to come out of the water so that I could get a picture. So I started to talk to her under my breath. It was that kind of day. “Come on, baby. Come up and play. You know you want to. Come up and play with me so that I can take your picture.”

Suddenly, I had the strongest sensation that not only was Baby coming up but that I knew where she would surface. I walked over to that spot and held my camera over the water and waited, and waited, and waited. Then, miraculously, there she was right in my camera lens. Time stood still as Baby and I checked each other out. Luckily I came out of my stupor as a little voice in my head reminded me to “click the button, stupid”.

Everyone on the catamaran was shouting and laughing at the same time. They were hoping that Baby would be back but I had a feeling that Baby had accomplished what she had intended for that day.

They say that Humpback whales are very susceptible to human emotions. Did Baby feel my playful exhortations and come up to play or was she just a curiously determined youngster with a very tolerant Mama? In the end, I don’t think it mattered. However, just in case it was the former, I sent out one last, heartfelt message. “Thank you, Baby. Thank you”.

Constance Weygandt is an author, speaker and balance mentor. For more information on balance and wellness or to sign up for Constance’s newsletter, visit her website at http://www.balancedwellnessonline.com

Any individual that has sought to get out of debt in past days has discovered that there are numerous debt easing answers ready for them to pick out from. So how does a individual determine which debt relief solutions would be the best for them? The most efficient debt relief resolution for a person will depend on a number of different factors that may be unique to the person that is looking for debt relief.

One of the most frequent debt relief solutions practiced today is the debt consolidation resolution. This solution is generally used when the individual has a huge number of prominent debts to credit card companies and other creditors that are charging them a high interest rate for the balances carried on their accounts. Debt consolidation works by choosing out a exclusive loan product, whether it is a credit card or a personal loan, and paying off the debt that the person is running with that loan. This method is really capable when the person can secure a much smaller interest rate for the loan than they were paying on each of their debt accounts.

Debt management can be another selection for you if you are prepared to allow someone to help manage your debts for you. If you are plannig on practicing a debt management system, you should be serious about paying off your debts and be willing to work with your debt manager on a often basis.

Debt negotiation can be a good option if you owe a large amount of money to your creditors and you are having difficulty paying your monthly minimum payments. Debt negotiation is often referred to as debt settlement and can often times be the most cost capable and smartest way to pay off your debts.